Every year Santa sends two North Pole Elves to our house. They are there in order to observe the behavior of everyone in the house to determine who should be placed on the Naughty or Nice list. Because the Elves are not nearly as busy as they are at the North Pole they have a lot of time on their hands and tend to get into quite a bit of mischief.
We were unfairly attacked last night by the new Elf, Ellie. Poor Glen suffered horrendous injuries.
Glen sustained severe injuries
We have now determined that this new Elf is a danger (and absolutely from the South Pole). We must protect oursleves at all times. We are also convinced that Ellie was working with someone on the inside. How else could she have gotten loose and attacked Glen?!
I did my best to stabilize Glen for the trip back to the North Pole where he will under go emergency brain surgery. And as much as the little guy Jack wants us to replace Glen's brain with a reindeer brain, I don't know if a transplant will be successful.
Jangle & the reindeer standing guard
Stabilizing Glen for the trip home
We will continue our investigation into this heinous crime, Santa. We will report back any findings.
It is always such a long trip from the North Pole to the our family's home. Even with all the anticipation of finally getting to see them again, it is a long trip. Obviously we did not pack enough treats for the reindeer's trip because they all got hungry. They decided to stop along the way (probably for donuts because they are Prancer's favorite!), and they must have gotten lost! At least Jangle, Glen and myself made it. I guess we know who the responsible ones are, right Santa?
When we arrived at the Olson/Pineda house, we saw that they had done a good job preparing for our arrival. Thank you, Santa for sending that letter. I think it helped them get their act in gear. They had decorated the house and even baked cookies! It's about time, if you ask me. It seems that every year when we arrive, Jangle heads straight for the cookie jar and finds it EMPTY!
Santa's letter explaining our arrival
At least they made us cookies!
We did have one small problem however. We had heard that they had recently added a new Elf to their house that needed some training, so we brought an authentic North Pole Elf Uniform to initiate this Elf into training. Well...I don't think Elf Ellie liked the uniform much because she trapped poor Jangle and Glen in a cage!
Their new Elf trapped us in her cage!
It was probably for the better anyway. Elf Ellie kept thinking they were food. I tried to tell her what we taught our buddy the Australian Shark when his buddies kept trying to eat Nemo. We aren't sure, but it is possible Elf Ellie is from the South Pole.
Elves are Friends, Not Food.
By the way, Santa...please tell our friends back at the Workshop that they can see all the stuff we are doing with our family on our Instagram account. (Pssst...the kids were shocked that us Elves know how to use technology. We may be hundreds of years old, but we are still hip and with it!)
It has been a while since we have updated. We have still been going to visit the Olson home every December. However, it has been a little calmer these past few years. After some discussion, Jangle and I believe that the main reason for this has to do with the one child...you know...the one that is part Elf. The one that we found out through a DNA sample is a direct descendant of Sugarsox O'Leary. We believe he has not received the proper Elf training throughout the years which is such a tragedy. Usually by this age (12), Elves have already learned how to make candy canes, how to tie their elf shoes, how to bake gingerbread cookies, have learned how to handle the reindeer and have their very own job in Santa's workshop. This poor lad doesn't even have his own proper elf hat or shoes! In addition, his human siblings have much more time to teach him human ways rather than Elf skills. We may have to focus on making the older ones "Honorable Elves" if we can demonstrate to the Head Elf that they deserve that title. We are a little skeptical, but think we are up for that challenge. There is only so much that can be done in the limited time we are with the family to teach the children the Elf ways and traditions. We feel partly responsible for the lack of Elf skills this family has. Good news is however, that every once in a while there is a hint of Elfin lineage running through their veins...they have been watching Christmas movies for several weeks now! This year we are determined to get this entire family to embrace their Elf heritage. In fact, we heard that they have added a new four-legged member to the family that obviously has had Elf training at some point. Hopefully that one (Ellie is the little squirts name), can help us with our mission.
Jack left a note for Santa asking when the Elves would be here. He has been pretty adamant that the Elves arrive on December 1st. Well here we are and it is December 3rd and still no Elves.
But when Jack woke up this morning and walked downstairs we heard an audible GASP. He had found the mailbox to Santa and a letter.
According to Santa, when he was handing out the flying powder our Elves were last in line. Apparently Jangle had to poop and was in the bathroom the whole time. So, they are running a little behind.
After sending the Head Elf photographic proof that it was safe for elves in the Olson household, we woke up to find that Alabaster, Jangle and Glen (who is earning his "Elf Name" this holiday season) had arrived ready to 'par-tee'!
Jolly".
Needless to say, the kids were all excited. The note that was left told us to remember that if we were to maintain our status as a host family we had to maintain a high level of Christmas spirit and good behavior. In their words- "Be good and Be
So our elves haven't "officially" arrived yet. Apparently when they do their home checks to make sure everything is safe for the Visiting Elves, they found something that caused concern at our house...an antler-less reindeer. (I may be jumping to conclusions here but I'm assuming they mean our new dog, Charlie).
Can you read "Elf Language"?
So in order to prove to the elves our home is safe for all elves, we are required to wear Authenic Elf Uniforms and send the Head Elf photographic proof that we are all safe. Only then will they dispatch our elves to our home.
The Head Elf left us something to open!
I never realized that there were so many precautions one had to take in order to have Elves visit your home at Christmas time!
But like any good host family, we did as we were asked and donned the uniforms and sent the proof to the North Pole. Now we just have to wait...
We woke up to the smell of pancakes yesterday! What a nice surprise. The elves must have heard Sam say he hoped the elves would make pancakes and sausage for breakfast. Although, the elves weren't quite sure why we call it "break" fast. They asked if we break things while we eat? Well, um, not since Jack outgrew that phase!
Glen was busy mixing up the batter...
While Jangled manned (ahem, I mean elfed) the griddle.
If you've ever seen the movie "Elf" with Will Farrell, you know elves are very good at snowball fights. That must have been what Alabaster and Jangle were trying to teach Glen when we were all gone at work and school.
I'm not sure who won, but when Jack and Sam found them they sure joined in! Thankfully mom was gone all night so she didn't have to see the mess the elves (and boys) were making in her house!
I find it amusing that the sign they chose to use as a barricade has a quote that says "Remember, as far as anyone knows, we are a Nice, Normal family". How appropriate.
Oh and I guess for good measure they redecorated mom's quilt rack. They took down her Christmas quilt and put up our underwear! (And the Incredible Hulk was using one as a swing!) I just don't understand the elves' fascination with underwear!
The elves enlisted the help of their trusted reindeer to take part in their little shenanigans the other night. Mom just about stumbled down a flight of stairs when she woke up! After turning on the light and going blind for about 15 seconds, she realized why.
The reindeer were all lined up for some reason. But she didn't have time to figure it out- there was coffee to be made. Soon, Sam woke up and as the smell of coffee wafted through the air, waking up brain cells, mom saw him reading something on the stairs. Still not fully functional, mom went about getting the coffee into a cup so she could finally form a coherent sentence. By then Jack was awake. Between the two boys they found Glen. But not Alabaster and Jangle. Glen was stuck about 10 feet up in the air on our chandelier!
He was tied to Lucy's dog bowl and was holding one of her treats. How he got way up there is beyond me and what he was doing was a mystery. Thankfully the elves left a note which Sam quickly took and deciphered in the mirror ( in case you forgot, elves write backwards so you need a mirror to decode it). Turns out the elves were trying to teach Lucy our dog, how to fly! But they were a bit disappointed in her effort. They said that no matter how many times they pushed her off the top step, she couldn't master the takeoff. I believe the reindeer were grading her and based on their scorecard she did not pass. And seeing as though Lucy was no where to be found, I'm assuming she wasn't quite as happy about trying to fly as the reindeer thought she would be.
The boys also discovered a whole bunch of grinch pencils the reindeer left them. It appears even the reindeer were watching for good behavior the night before - of which there was little! The reindeer told the boys that they could only use grinch pencils in school today because they had been so grouchy the night before!
Then I heard Jack shout "they left another note!" And off he ran.
Well, we found out where the other two elves were.
They were digging in the cookie jar! They must have found Lucy's dog treats and thought they were cookies ( Worst Cookies Ever apparently). They left mom a note saying she needed to find a new recipe for cookies because these were disgusting.
This morning mom woke up to a race track in the middle of her living room. Literally.
Seems the elves were having a bit of a contest to see who was faster.
(Are the elves LOSING?)
And the reindeer were gambling on the outcome. Naughty, naughty reindeer! I wonder if there is a naughty list for reindeer?
When mom got home from work that night and asked the kids who won the race, Jack said the elves did...with a little sheepish grin on his face. Then he said that the elves cheated and used the sleigh! And everyone knows sleighs are lightning fast.
I think a note to Santa to tell him his elves aren't behaving might be in order.
This morning we woke up to find a letter in the elves' mailbox from Santa. He explained that the new elf, Glen, came with Alabaster and Jangle because Alabaster was a Master Elf Trainer and Glen needed some big-time help in that area. Plus our household was known for being patient with elf messes and Santa knew we could handle him. If Glen is able to pass all his Elf courses, he will be rewarded with an Official Elf name.
So after reading that, Sam went to check on the elves and they were MISSING! He looked everywhere an couldn't find them. Mom was heading out the door for work and walked passed the bathroom and gasped! This is what she found:
Alabaster was instructing Glen on Present Wrapping 101. (We are pretty sure Jangle failed that class as you might be able to tell from this next picture.
The note Alabaster left said that Glen was practicing his skills and wrapped something for us. But he couldn't lift it to get it under our tree. He told us not to open it until Christmas. Fat chance, Mr. Elf.
We found the reindeer reading a book together very nicely. Last night Jack read them all a story about the Pigeon wants a Puppy, and tucked the reindeer into a nice cozy blanket and pillow.
Maybe that's why the reindeer were so well behaved.
Oh, and when the kids came home from school those darn elves were into mischief again! They made a rope ladder out of poor little Jack's undies and climbed the boys dresser to try and get into Sam's safe. Stinkers!
Today is Ana's 16th birthday and when mom woke up and came downstairs (*ahem*, notice she's the first one up?) she found the elves had made breakfast for everyone! Now, it's not the most nutritious by our standards, but by elf standards...
They left her a note saying that since today was her birthday she didn't have to eat anything green (i.e. Vegetables, I assume) or purple (I have no idea what purple things elves eat!). AND she could play with any toy in the workshop. Wow, elf birthdays sound like a lot of fun in the North Pole.
Oh, but she had to hurry because "Glen" was hungry. (That must be their friend's name! We were wondering what his name was. Sam wouldn't let him sleep in the elves' tent last night because he said he was weird. He didn't have any feet and his head turned 360 degrees. I hope Santa doesn't hear him talking like that!)
Our table was decorated in the color of the elves!
